Search This Blog

Friday, July 23, 2010

Raising Thinkers

I was just laying in bed thinking about an article that I read yesterday and shared on FB. I was really hoping that someone would read it, comment, and that we could have a discussion about it. Yet, it didn't happen. Either there was no interest or people saw how long it was and thought, "why bother?" Either way, I would like to share what I consider some of the more important points from the article and my thoughts on it. I also want to share some information about why it interests me and how it's applicable to us and our families. Here's the URL if you want to read it now: http://www.newsweek.com/2010/07/10/the-creativity-crisis.html

Early on in my relationship with Shawn I noticed a major difference (many actually) in the way our brains worked. In this particular instance (one instance mind you), he had (and has) a major advantage over me. He is a tremendous problem solver. When something unexpected happens and things don't turn out the way that he wants them to, he stops, thinks, and attempts to figure out another alternative. He doesn't accept defeat easily. Rather he has confidence that if he thinks about whatever it is and digs deep enough, it can be fixed or at least something can be salvaged from it. And he's usually right.

I used to be just the opposite. If something bad happened, all I could see was the negative. My mind went into crisis or panic mode...which ultimately accomplished nothing good. In many cases, this kind of thinking can paralyze you with fear. If you think like this, then when there is a problem you see yourself at a point of no return with no real chance of anything good coming out of a situation.

I'm thankful that I recognized these differences between us and realized what a problem these tendencies in myself were. I won't say that I don't ever have "freak out" moments because that would be a lie. Yet, being with Shawn for all these years has taught me that thoughtful effort, even in the most difficult of situations, can bring positive results.

As for the article...studies have been done recently that show that for the first time ever in U.S. history, creativity is on the decline. It's referring to the years since 1990. Some of this can be explained by the birth of the internet and the "information age." They're thinking that a lot of it can be explained by all of the hours that kids waste playing video games and watching mindless TV. Kids know more facts but have a hard time transferring all this stuff into their lives to produce anything positive. The experts fear that if this is going to leave us with a population of adults unable to innovate, create, and solve problems, and I tend to agree with them.

Think about the oil crisis in the gulf and the mess that we're in now. Though, we aren't quite getting the results we want, there are some pretty smart people with really great ideas working on it. We're all just hoping that their ideas are great enough! And that's just one example of a national crisis that is going to require more than a just a lot of book knowledge.

The study shows that if you aren't the greatest problem solver, you can be taught to be. It offers information and resources that can help you personally, and help you to teach your children to be more competent in these areas. And the great news is that it is being done and there are proven results that it works!

Following are the results in one school in which creativity is the focus. “You never see our kids saying, ‘I’ll never use this so I don’t need to learn it,’ ” says school administrator Maryann Wolowiec. “Instead, kids ask, ‘Do we have to leave school now?’ ” Two weeks ago, when the school received its results on the state’s achievement test, principal Traci Buckner was moved to tears. The raw scores indicate that, in its first year, the school has already become one of the top three schools in Akron, despite having open enrollment by lottery and 42 percent of its students living in poverty.

So how is this relevant to us and our children? Well, on a personal level, having the abilities of creativity and problem solving can make all the difference in whether we feel hopeful or hopeless when difficult situations arise. If our children are deficient in these areas, they will be more likely to lay down and cry when problems arise or call Mom and Dad (which will likely continue into adulthood, mind you) while the ones who are strong in these areas will be more apt to stand on their own two feet and solve their problems themselves.

Obviously we as parents can't change the whole educational system. We can only hope and pray for the best. Yet there are things that we can be doing to encourage our children's development in these areas.

We can ask them lots of open-ended questions. Annacie gets pretty annoyed with me at times when she asks me a question and I turn it back on her and ask, "what do you think?" It gets her thinking though. If you're reading a book or watching a movie with your child, you may ask questions like, "why do you think he did that?", "what would have been a better idea?", or "what do you think is going to happen next?" Or you may want to buy your child some LEGOS, take away the idea sheet, and let him come up with his own plan. An additional challenge could be to get your child to look at what's there, draw a picture of what he/she wants to create, and then try to make it.

The article says that for young children, role play can also encourage these qualities in children. It enables them to see things from another perspective which encourages more complex thinking. When they're playing or working and they come across a problem that they want you to fix, you can encourage them to come up with their own ideas about how to solve the problem. This will be most effective if you are there, not to do it for them, but to support them through the process. If you have ideas or things that you do to this end, I would love for you to share in the comments section. I'm always looking for new ideas.

One more important thing that you can do to encourage your children to become problem solvers is to become one yourself. Keep those brain cells active, and your children will be more likely to do the same. Again if you would like more info. from a more professional perspective, the URL is at the end of my first paragraph. Thanks for being a sounding board for me. : )



Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Those Empty Places

Are their attributes of God that you have difficulty grasping...like maybe his love, forgiving nature, guiding presence in your life, trustworthiness, etc.? I have read and heard that it's hard for people to recognize attributes in God that were/are not apparent in their relationships with their earthly fathers. I have found this to be true in my life.

There are some things about God that I sense very clearly on a day-to-day basis. One of these is his guidance in my life. It's very clear to me that my whole life He's been bringing me to greater heights in my relationship with Him. He is also forever developing my character and molding me and making me into the person He created me to be. In every area of my life in which I put forth effort, he brings me to a higher level of learning, understanding, or achievement. At this point in my life, I see this in areas of time management, housekeeping, caring for my children, teaching my children, and loving my husband. God's just good like that. I see the fruits of it daily.

An attribute that I have trouble grasping in Him, though, is His love for me. Don't get me wrong. My earthly Daddy loves me. He just isn't always the best at showing it. I don't blame him for this. We're all wired differently from birth, and our experiences in life have a major impact on who we become too. Yet I do see a connection between my trouble grasping God's love for me and my trouble at times grasping my Daddy's love for me.

I remember hearing Joyce Meyer say a couple of times that she spent a whole year studying about God's love in the Bible because it was hard for her to receive it. In no way, shape or form, do I have the difficult past that she had to overcome. Yet I would probably do really well to follow her advice. At this moment, though, I'm thinking it would help me to reflect on His love for me by remembering all that He's done for me.

Praise the LORD, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name. Praise the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's. (Psalm 103:1-5)

The older I get, the more I understand that people were not put here to fill my every need. Seeking that in any relationship is like going down a dead-end-road. It's a waste of time. God created people to love and support us but not to meet our every need. That's something that only He can do. If that were not so, what need would we have for Him? Thinking on that truth makes me thankful for the the areas in my heart that my Daddy, my husband, and no one else can fill or heal. It just makes me all the more thankful for the One who can.