I find though that in almost every situation, if you look hard enough, there's something to be thankful for. The key is to turn those thoughts of pity into prayers of praise and thanksgiving. I tried to do this for a time apart from God but it never lasted. Yet through an abiding relationship with Him, through prayer, reading His Word, and making the choice daily to "keep my thoughts captive to the obedience of Christ," I've seen a consistent "moving forward" in this area.
I'm amazed at the way God has worked in my life as I've learned to hold my tongue in some of those negative moments. I liken the pain associated with it, this dying of the flesh, to the death of Christ's body on the cross. We must go through this pain, this molding and refining process so that He can grow us in His righteousness. It's intense in the midst of it, but when it's over, I experience joy and peace that comes only as a result of obeying Him.
I try to ask myself the question, "Is this a word of encouragement to lift somebody up, or is it a word of condemnation that is going to just push someone down further?" God's love doesn't penetrate our darkness through condemnation, but through the hope that is in Him. That ultimately brings the change that He wants in us anyway.
Without love we have nothing, we are nothing, and we can do nothing. Do everything in love.
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